My best friend and I were talking last night about life. I admitted to my mistakes since my divorce. One of which is trying to feel validated, value, and special from men. I believed a lot of what some men said when it wasn't true. I did things I should not have done, some just for attention or for those reasons I already listed.
I have learned lessons from my mistakes.
I know what I want too.
I have had someone trying to go on a date with me, but he isn't a "practicing" Christian. (His words, not mine.) I turned him down. I do not want to be unequally yoked. So, I have learned to not just go out with anyone, but be picky about it. I don't want a "practicing" Christian anyway, I want a sold out, loves God fully Christian who prays, reads his Bible and attends church. I am not legalistic at all, and they don't have to be perfect, but someone who matches me better.
I have some great Christian guy friends who are like this.
My point is this: we all make mistakes. In different ways and with different issues. The key is learning from those mistakes.
I was planning on writing about this, and when I woke up to read my Jesus Calling devotional, God did it again today!
"Don't be so hard on yourself. I can bring good even out of your mistakes. Your finite mind tends to look backward, longing to undo decisions you have come to regret. This is a waste of time and energy, leading only to frustration. Instead of floundering in the past, release your mistakes to Me. Look to Me in trust, anticipating that My infinite creativity can weave both good choices and bad into a lovely design.
Because you are human, you will continue to make mistakes. Thinking that you should live an error-free life is symptomatic of pride. Your failures can be a source of blessing, humbling you and giving you empathy for other people in their weaknesses. Best of all, failure highlights your dependence on Me. I am able to bring beauty out of the morass of your mistakes. Trust Me, and watch to see what I will do."
Yeah, so that pretty much sums up how God feels about our mistakes.
I say, learn from them. Remember what you did wrong. Forgive yourself and move forward. God forgives you, so why don't you forgive yourself?