So, I somewhat got knocked in the head this morning...
God revealed to me that I have an idol in my life.
This is got to leave NOW!
My wanting to be in a relationship with a man is my idol.
I have focused on it too much and allowed it to take up more time than my thoughts about God. Not anymore.
Dictionary.com defines "idol" in a few different ways, but the one that jumped out at me the most is "any person or thing regarded with blind admiration, adoration, or devotion."
You see, I want something I feel like I never really had. I want someone to love me the right way... but what I NEED is to let GOD love me the right way first.
I need to have full admiration, adoration and devotion to GOD first. Not a man.
One of my close friends has been talking to me about this recently and not until this moment do I understand why she's been saying "You are blocking God's blessing for you."
Then today's Jesus Calling devotional took it to another level:
"Remember that you live in a fallen world: an abnormal world tainted by sin. Much frustration and failure result from your seeking perfection in this life. There is nothing perfect in this world except Me. That is why closeness to Me satisfies deep yearnings and fills you with joy.
I have planted longing for perfection in every human heart. This is a good desire, which I alone can fulfill. But most people seek this fulfillment in other people and earthly pleasures or achievements. Thus they create idols, before which they bow down. I will have no other gods before Me! Make Me the deepest desire of your heart. Let Me fulfill your yearning for perfection."
God is perfect. Men are not.
God will love me unconditionally, forever. He will never leave me or forsake me. Like men have.
My desire should be to let God work, move, and breathe on me so that I can continue to do what He has called me to do.
Do you struggle with an idol?
Maybe you didn't even realize you were struggling with one, kinda like me. I would love to talk to you about it.
God loves Jill. THIS Jill. And He always will!