I Have a Confession to Make

Hello. My name is Jill and I struggle with being present.

I am an only child and a planner by nature. Therefore, I struggle with going with the flow and just living out life daily.

This is about to change.

One huge lesson I have learned in 2014 is that I can't continue living like this. Someone gets hurt living this way...that someone is ME!

Being present, being in the here and now speaks volumes! It shows the people in your life that they are important to you. It helps you focus on them as well.

Let me tell you a quick story. I have friends. I have several best friends. They are amazing. They love me even when I'm not being smart. They listen to me, and tell me if I'm doing something that might hurt me in the long run. No ear tickling here... and I like that. I want friends who will speak into my life and help me improve. That is one positive thing about me, I want to improve. 
I want to grow and learn.

So, the picture above was taken Sunday after church in my car.

I wanted to go shop in the mall, but had about an hour before it opened.

I couldn't find anyone to go to lunch with. I asked a few people and they couldn't, or didn't..... which ever.

There are many times that I enjoy being alone. As an only child, I was alone a lot so I'm used to it...but man...there are other times that I just want to hang out with someone.

Sunday for lunch was one of those times.

It didn't happen.

These past few days, I've thought about it... I am not present enough.

Planning ahead is not bad in and of itself. In this situation, I might have had a friend eat lunch with me if I would have planned ahead...

BUT

I have got to stop living in the past and in the future so much that I am not paying attention to today.

Can anyone relate to this? Or am I just crazy?